could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
