If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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