I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Randomize
