I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
