i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
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