Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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