i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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