If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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