Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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