Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
