ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
