I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
