Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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