So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
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