I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
The convent might be a nice break from real life
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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