Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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