Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
