I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
