Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
