Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
