trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
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