You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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