You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Randomize
