so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
