I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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