Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize