How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
