whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
