At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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