I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Randomize
