..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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