Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
