gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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