New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
