We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Randomize
