I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Randomize
