is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
