College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize
