He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Randomize
