Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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