Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize