his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
