tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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