She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
