Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
