that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Randomize
