She said her name was "party"
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
