The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
