So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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