dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
